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I Lost Self-Confidence

“Nothing builds self-esteem and self-confidence like accomplishment.”

- Thomas Carlyle

Picture credit: Geralt on

Many people, including seasoned leaders and successful business owners, experience moments when they feel a decline in self-confidence. But, what can you do to increase your confidence?

Every person has their own ways to shake off the feelings of doubt. I will share my own approach in this article in hopes that it helps you rise from the state of questioning your capabilities.


As soon as I start feeling my self-confidence abandoning me, I ask myself, “What price am I willing to pay to increase it?” The first step in making any change is commitment to making an amendment or two to your thinking, behaviors, and surroundings. Any change requires quite a bit of effort. An effort requires time and is not a pain-free process. Sometimes this process leads to losing people in your established circles.

Next, I identify the "culprits" that keep me going back to the state of unnecessary concerns. Ultimately, I work on understanding the underlying causes and situations that led me to think and act hesitantly. It is important to address the root cause of the problem quickly because the overpowering sense of self-doubt can easily result in anxiety, stress, and paralysis.

One theme that could surface during the discovery process is fear of being judged by friends, family, or former business colleagues. When this fear shows up, acknowledge the existence of the irrational and illogical feeling. I am sure that it would only confirm and support the thoughts and opinions of a very few in your circle. If not, seek another circle of influence. The reality is that the potential judgment, questioning, and doubts by others have nothing to do with your unlimited abilities.

The truth here is simple; not one individual, including your friend, co-worker, boss, customer, family member, etc., can define who you are or your potential. Setbacks happen, and they happen for a reason. When they do, adjust the direction you are going without losing your passion. Without these moments, when we temporarily lose confidence, we wouldn’t see the new ways to create, to inspire, and to influence. It is best to look at our biggest doubters as the fuel to continue building our unlimited potential. Regardless of how relentless your critics are in their pursuit to prove that you won’t succeed, try not to lose confidence. Instead, concentrate on your achievements and look at the big picture or your life mission.


Here are 5 tips that might help you raise your self-confidence:

  1. Write down your biggest achievements to date.

  2. Pick a successful situation from your list, similar to what you are dealing with right now and ask, “What actions did I take, and what behaviors did I demonstrate that helped me succeed?” Concentrate on what worked. There is no reason to go down the rabbit hole or dwell on what didn’t work.

  3. Once you determine these success-inducing actions, think how you can apply them to your current situation. Concentrate on your strengths and contemplate, “What experience and strengths do I bring to this situation?”

  4. Determine the next steps. How can I use my experience and strengths to move forward with completing a task or project? The process of identification of your strengths and past achievements is important as it leads to building your plan of action with less fear and doubt.

  5. Measure the progress along the way and celebrate even small achievements. Not only measuring the progress is a great tool to see if you are moving in the right direction and adjusting, it is also an effective way to build self-confidence. (Give yourself credit for your uniqueness and greatness!)

In closing, I urge you to look at the big picture when dealing with self-doubt and lack of self-confidence. Perhaps, one of the most valuable steps we can take when in doubt is to remind ourselves of a bigger purpose and reasons why we do what we do.

What is the best that can happen if you let go of self-doubts and grow your confidence?

Comment below to share your strategies that helped you increase self-confidence.

If you need assistance, please don't hesitate to check out my company's services Thank you for reading.

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